Grape Thread

[MAC_HATER]

[InterzoneagentN]

Seedless grapes - yes or no?

Seeded.  I only choose not to eat the finest organically grown seeded grapes.  I would never choose to not eat any grapes that are seedless on account for my distrust of all people in charge of food here in 'merica.

[InterzoneagentN]

This is such a grape thread. It's ok I can pun like that. I'm a dad.

1 Dad agrees, this is the best thread on the forum.  

Also I petition that we refer to Al Hungerstrike as Dad from now on.

[kadaver]

What do grapes make? Sweetberry wine, of course!





For your health!

[Blood Music]

grape

[InterzoneagentN]

Yes! Bringing back the grape thread! Sounds like Dr. Blood Music has grapes on the brain.

Fun fact about grapes, which I still do not like very much, grapes were invented by Protestant missionaries in the late 1800's during their many pilgrimages to southwest China. Soon the Protestants began to harness the power of grapes and sold them year round all over the globe by 1915. Wine was first invented in 1919 but was unfortunately created shortly before prohibition in the United States which lead Europe to becoming one of the biggest importers of fine wines while the States lived through 13 years of sobriety. This is why wine has such a huge presence in Europe. Interestingly enough Europe was originally spelled Yourup until 1923 when the King of Europe misspelled it so many times that everyone just said 'Fuck it! We are Europe now.'

The more you know!

[Blood Music]

Grapes were invented?

[InterzoneagentN]

Indeed they were Dr. Blood Music.  While it may sound absurd at first when you consider the infrastructure of a grape it is actually very apparent that it was invented by man in our own image.  Grapes have a thin skin which, when peeled, gives way to a juicy, intricate vein system where the blood of each grape (grape juice) pulses from region to region.  This is akin to the average human being.  Should we peel the skin of a human off of a person it would also reveal a juicy, intricate vein system with their blood (human juice) pulsing throughout their body.  

If one digs further into the guts of a grape they will find grape seeds (grape eggs) which each grape uses in order to reincarnate itself upon death should it fall into fertile soil in a manner not unlike the Phoenix.  

“The phoenix must burn to emerge.”
― Janet Fitch

One could argue that the grape must also burn to emerge.  But from those grapely ashes will rise a vine which yields mirror images of that one grape so that it can continue to live infinitely.  

So yes, grapes were invented.

[Blood Music]

Haha okay, I think I need another beer or two, this is starting to get interesting.

[hugo]

what even is going on here